Op-Ed Columns

Being a Southern gentleman and a man of some modesty and reserve (stop snickering), I was not sure how I should approach this topic publicly — in writing or otherwise.

However, I felt it was my duty as a husband and the father of two daughters, not to mention a son, to alert my small and much-appreciated cadre of readers to the fact that October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

My concern about how to approach the subject surfaced in late September when I was told that on Oct. 1 everyone was supposed to wear pink in support of the fight against the disease.

Now I was sure some folks wouldn't because they didn't know about it; would have but didn't get the memo. Others wouldn't, guys mostly, because they think pink is a "girly" color. They are the same ones who also think breast cancer only strikes women. Neither is the case. Go back to the '50s and you will find Elvis in pink and black — and we all know Elvis was all man. And men can get breast cancer, just like women.

Secure in my masculinity, I wore pink.

So did my teenage son.

Only he did me one better.

On his shirt was a slogan: "Save the Ta-Tas."

With those words across his chest, his mama took him to school.

And left me home and concerned.

Now, my wife is the woman who defines everything the boy and I do by "appropriate" and "inappropriate." So as they drove off, I went to wondering how this got through her "inappropriate" filter.

She knows, just as I know, that teenage boys spend a lot of time thinking about "Ta-Tas." But being a woman, and a wise one at that, she realized that for our boy, and likely for a lot of other boys and girls, "Ta-Tas" represented something more than the subject of "inappropriate" humor.

Let me explain.

Shortly after my son was born his mother became an advocate of breast feeding. Even joined Le Leche. Found local women of a similar mind, and pretty soon they had their own little "ta-tas for tots" support group.

The boy took right to it.

But the term "Ta-Ta" was not in our dictionary until one evening my brother-in-law called, and while he and my wife were on the phone my infant son started screaming so loudly that he drowned out the conversation. So my in-law, who at the time had no children of his own, advised my wife to "stick a Ta-Ta in his mouth."

She did. It worked.

And from that time on, "Ta-Ta" was part of our childrearing vocabulary.

So I was hardly surprised that my teenage son wanted to wear a shirt with that slogan to usher in Breast Cancer Awareness Month. And I should not have been surprised that his mother let him. But I was.

I was also surprised that I did not get a phone call from his school.

I went to work that morning convinced that as soon as he arrived someone — teacher or administrator — would take one look at the "Ta-Ta" slogan, haul him off to "the office" and I would have to troop down and bail him out.

Didn't happen.

According to his after-school report, he mostly got "atta-boys" from folks who apparently knew what I didn't know — that "Save the Ta-Tas" is the slogan of a movement that combines fashion and health awareness and makes a point in the process (go to www.savethetatas.com and find out more).

And so it turns out that the boy and his mother were right in their choice of shirt and slogan. (I frequently acknowledge the correctness of my wife's actions. As for my son, I check with my wife before I make a decision.) Not only is it entirely appropriate to publicly refer to that part of the female anatomy in this way — it is "breast" cancer awareness month, for heaven's sake — using a child's term for the item involved makes us remember how this disease strikes not only a person but also a circle of family and friends, and strikes them in the most fundamental way.

"Ta-Tas" are important to us all.

Our ancient ancestors worshiped female deities as the source of life and frequently depicted them anatomically exaggerated so that we would not miss the point. (I often have felt that Protestants such as myself could use a little maternal influence in our religion, like Catholics have with Mary, but what do I know?)

So, remember that Breast Cancer Awareness Month is about life. The more aware we are of the disease, the more lives we will save. The more lives we save, the more children will have mothers and fathers, the more husbands and wives will have each other, the more families will be together, the more friends will have friends.

Support the cause.

And save the Ta-Tas.